The Heartbreaking Emotions Hidden Within
by TeamJanny
Summary: After a shooting, Jac is left on the verge of a breakdown. After being tipped over the edge, she's sectioned with those who are closest to her believing that she is beyond help. Despite only knowing Jac for a few days, will Johnny be able to help her recover or will she be cut off forever! Please read and review! BTW it used to be called 'The Apple Which Changes The Future'
1. I like that

Bloody people skills course, who the hell does he think he is sending me to listen to complete bullshit for a weekend, I thought as I arrived. I got out of my car and headed inside the hotel, my head filled with anger. I was wearing a black skirt, a shirt, a blazer and a pair of black heals. I entered a room filled with empty chairs, only three of them were occupied. On a wall there was a notice with the itinerary. I looked at each over the three people and decided who would be the most likely to add enjoyment to this hell like course. He was tall and handsome, stuck on his checker shirt was a label which read 'Johnny Maconie'.

A blonde American woman worked towards me. 'And you are?' she asked politely.

'Jac Naylor.' I replied, I had been here less than a minute and I was already bored.

'Ahh yes, Miss Naylor.' She said sticking a label on my blazer which read 'Jackie Naylor.'

'No, I'm not wearing this, my name's not Jackie.' I said standing up. 'Hanssen is really taking the piss, sending me to a place like this full of sad, boring idiots.'

'I now realise why Henrick badgered me so much to get you on this course. Before the rest arrive I want you to get one thing straight, this is not a playground. This is a course for professional human beings. I don't know exactly what you are but you're no different from any of us. Just because you have a better job title doesn't mean that you're a better person. So remember, this is no place for your bitchy little tricks.' She said rudely, yet quietly so that only Johnny and I could hear.

The cow, what right has she got to talk to me like that? I sat back down, ignoring her completely. After a few minutes she got the message and pissed off.

'So, why are you here Jac?' Asked Johnny. 'I get that it's because of your attitude and that, but you must have done something pretty bad to be sent to this hell whole!'

'I shouted at an F1 and told her that she was nothing, and something along the lines of that I wouldn't let her into theatre even I f the rest of the staff were struck down by Ebola and I was flat lining on the table. On top of that I told the DOS that he was taking his anger out on me after an ex-colleague he was supposedly in love left and that all the nurses are shit at their jobs.' I replied, there was no point in lying.

'Well, your colleagues must love you.' He replied sarcastically. 'I mean, you don't actually seem to bother trying to get people to like you. I like that.'

'You're the only one.' I replied, smiling a little.

'Wait, so you're GS, right?' He asked, he seemed to know who I was.

'I used to be, CT consultant now. How did you know?' I asked, I was curious to know where this information had come from.

'Let's just say there's not many people in our line of work who don't know of Lord Byrne and I know that your name has popped up before.' He replied, I looked at the floor in shame.

'Yes, that was a long time ago.' I said, trying to think of a way to change the subject. 'So, what about you, you're an orthopod'

'God no, I'm a neurosurgeon.' He replied, he surprised me a great deal with that.

'Well, heart rules head as they say.' I replied cockily. I was quite taken a back when he started laughing.

'You're funny, you know that.' He flirted.

'Shut up. Sweet talking doesn't work on me.' I replied, he was going to have to try harder than that if he wants me.

'So, you're an ice queen, I like that as well.' He said, somehow he could see right through me.

'Is there anything you don't like?' I said sarcastically.

'Being sent on this bloody course, my CEO is trying to get me to become the perfect boss. I've recently been made consultant, so he thinks that I would benefit from this. Apparently I need to form better working relationships with my colleagues and be able to take ownership.' He explained, his personality intrigued me, yet his mouth just pushed me away.

'Where do you work?' I asked, I was genuinely interested for once.

'Bath, it's quite a nice hospital. Not as nice as Holby, but it's alright.' He replied.

'I was treated there a few years ago, it seemed like a good hospital.' I said.

'Really, what happened?' He asked, I didn't know what to say.

'It's a long story but I had to be rushed in for an emergency, severe septic shock and multiple organ failure. I was fine though.' I said, not wanting to reveal too much.

'That's good. Do you want to go for a drink after this is over?' He asked.

'Maybe.' I replied, leaving him hanging. I went over to join those of the people who had recently arrived, most of them dull and sad. I

The rest of the day I stuck with Johnny, we got on well, spending most of our time laughing and flirting. No matter what I throw at him, he would shrug it off and laugh. He knew how to keep me in my place without being bossy or telling me what to do, throughout the day he subconsciously kept me grounded. He wasn't fazed by my icy exterior, I'd never come across anyone like him. Not only was he different, he was also cleaver and funny, his manner strangely attracted me.

That evening, we were sat in the bar. I was drinking my third vodka and tonic; he was drinking his second rum and coke. I wasn't a regular drinker, so I was very drunk. I just sat there giggling, he was rambling on about some random crap. His consistent crap began to annoy me, so I did the only thing I knew that would shut him up. I kissed him.

He kissed me back, sliding his tongue into my mouth. I felt his hand move up my leg, the other one in my long hair. He was a good kisser to say the least, but just kissing wasn't enough, I wanted more.

I pulled away long enough to whisper 'I've got a room, let's use it.' We carried on snogging before heading upstairs. His hands on my waist as I opened the door. He began undoing the buttons of my white shirt, revealing my red lace bra. I ripped off his shirt and his belt. I felt his hands undoing my bra as I worked on his trousers. And you can guess what happens next.

The next morning I awoke early, before the sun had risen. My head was spinning and I could remember very little of the night before. I could feel my leg brush against another leg which was not my own. I rolled over to find Johnny asleep. I didn't take me long to work out what had gone on. I quietly got out of the bed, a sheet wrapped around me in case I woke him up. I got dressed in the bathroom, grabbed my bag and left. I didn't feel in the least bit guilty, it was a fling. Quick and easy sex, no strings attached. If only I'd known that it wasn't going to be that simple.

As I drove away, I realised how long it had been since a man had paid the slightest bit of attention to me. I would have said Shaun but I don't think that he qualifies a man.


	2. Well that was awkward

Sat at the nurse's station, officially board out of my mind and eating a bright red apple. I was wearing my usual brown trousers, plain white shirt and hair up. As I munched on my healthy, I heard something rather familiar. A voice, a man's voice, where had I heard it before? I searched my mind yet I still couldn't put my finger on it. I bit into the juicy red fruit when he came into view. My eyes widened as he looked at me. It had been two days since I'd seen that handsome face and heard that sexy accent.

I began to choke on the apple and got a surprising thump on my back from my favourite incompetent F2. My embarrassing incident hadn't gone unnoticed by the sexy nurse. Wait he's a nurse? He told me he was neurosurgeon. He walked over to me, a large smile across his face and Elliott by his side.

'Ahh, Miss Naylor, this is Johnny Maconie. He's going to be the new transplant coordinator and is replacement for Nurse Lleucu Jones. Nurse Maconie meet cardiothoracic consultant Jac Naylor.' Said Elliott, hi broad smile growing ever bigger.

'Miss Naylor.' He said shaking my hand. 'Have we met?'

'No, I don't think so.' I replied, glaring at him.

'Are you sure, your face is familiar.' He said he was really pushing my buttons.

'I'm sure.' I said, successfully throwing my apple into the bin on the other side of the room.

'Well, I'll leave the two of you to become well acquainted. I believe that Miss Effanga is on her way.' Said Elliott, retreating to his office.

'What are you doing here?' I whispered harshly.

'Working.' He replied sarcastically.

'Piss off!' I said heading towards the staff room. I passed a pregnant woman on my way there.

'Hello. Can I help you?' I said, I didn't really care but I felt it was my duty to nose in on other's business.

'I hope so, I'm the new registrar.' She replied, I could already tell that she was a confident, bubbly pain up the ass.

'Great!' I said sarcastically walking into the staff room.

She followed saying 'Sorry, you are?'

'Cardiothoracic consultant Jac Naylor and if I'm not mistaken you're Ms Effanga, am I correct.' I said making myself a hot cup of coffee.

'Yes, but call me Mo. I need to find Mr Elliott Hope, where would I find him?' She asked, resting her hand on her bump.

'I need to go to the office so follow me.' I said walking away, Mo rushing to catch up. In the office, Elliott and Mo were discussing the hospital she used to work in when Johnny came in.

'Mo!' He said wrapping his arms around her. 'How are you?'

'You two know each other?' I asked an element of surprise in my voice.

'Yes, she's my best friend.' He said putting his arm around her.

'Well, what did you come in here for?' I asked rudely. 'This isn't a drop in centre.'

'You're needed on bay 3.' He said I followed him, thinking of what to see.

'As soon as we've finished with Mrs Flowers, we need to talk.' I whispered.

'Sure, where do you want to meat?' He asked I didn't want anywhere public so suggested the basement.

Mrs Flowers signed the consent form after a lot of persuasion. I'm fed up of the elderly fussing and panicking about everything! They really get on my nerves. Well, at least I was able to perform an aortic valve replacement on her later. I had about an hour to talk to Johnny and get on with some paperwork.

On my way down to the basement I thought about Sacha, I hadn't been to see him yet as he was still in a coma. Although there was no doubt that I was Sacha's best friend, I still felt like I would be intruding by going to see him. I knew that he was strong, yet I couldn't help thinking that he wasn't strong enough.

Johnny was stood leaning on the wall, a phone in his hands. He looked up at me as I cleared my throat. His emerald coloured eyes glistening in the small amount of light. He had a large smile across his handsome face. We just stood staring at each other. Something about him made me lose all sense of myself. The rest of my world was a complete blur.

'So you wanted to tell me something?' He said whatever I needed to say was long gone from my mind.

'Shut up and kiss me.' I said pressing my lips against his.

I drew apart long enough for him to say 'Are you sure?' I answered him by slipping my tongue into his mouth. He pushed me up against the cold wall, his hands on my hips. I not only wanted him, I needed him and I knew that he needed me too. His hands slid down my side and onto my thighs. He lifted me up and let me wrap my legs around him. I knew that we couldn't do anything here despite how much I wanted to.

I pulled my lips away and whispered 'My office, five minutes. Elliott's in theatre and I don't expect that Tara would want to disturb us.'

He kissed me again before letting me go; I walked away, a huge grin upon my face. I went straight to the lockers and grabbed my bag. I redid my makeup and changed my ugly hospital trainers to expensive black heels. I took my hair down from its messy bun and it fell perfectly around my face. I looked at myself in the mirror, my auburn hair shone in the dim light, my bright red lips stood out against my pale white skin. I breathed in before leaving.

I passed Oliver along the corridor; he looked at me, a bewildered expression on his face. 'Miss Naylor?' He said confusedly. 'You look, well… nice. No, that's not the word, you look beautiful.'

Well, I haven't felt this flattered for a while. 'Sucking up will get you nowhere.' I said harshly, I don't remember the last time that he actually gave me a compliment so I couldn't be expected to except one out of the blue.

'No seriously. I'm not being a suck up, you do look lovely.' He said kindly.

'Well, thank you.' I said. To be honest, it felt odd actually thanking someone.

I realised that I needed to meet Johnny so left Oliver. I walked into my office and sat on my chair, my heart fluttering inside my rib cage. Two long minutes passed before Johnny knocked on my door.

'Come in.' I called. He swung open the door, his face showing how much he wanted me. He closed the door behind him and walked over to me slowly. He grabbed my hand and pulled me up. He pushed me onto the table and pressed his soft lips against mine. His hands undoing my shirt, button by button. It wasn't long until I'd have him once again.

Both of our shirts flung on the floor, he grabbed my heels and chucked them on the chair. He lifted me up and carried me to the sofa. We were laid on the sofa making out-both of us topless I must add, when the door swung open. It was Elliott and Oliver. Johnny and I both jumped and looked up at a shocked Elliott and a laughing Ollie.

'I'm so sorry, I had no idea that you were in here.' Said Elliott, his eyes bulging out of his head. Oliver and Elliott left quickly, I'd never felt so embarrassed in my life. I hurriedly grabbed my shirt and shoes put them on and ran after Elliott and Ollie. Not say a single word to an uncomfortable Johnny.

I ran towards Oliver and Elliott, quite slowly due to the fact that I was wearing heels. They both turned around and smirked at me. Their smug faces making me even more awkward.

'At least I now know why you were looking so nice. Making an effort for your boyfriend, that's sweet.' He said sarcastically.

The nurses were staring at us, so I grabbed hold of both Oliver's and Elliott's arms and pulled them into the staff room, it would have been in the office if hadn't known that Johnny would still be there.

'He's not my boyfriend, we just…' I trailed off. 'We met on the people skills course; he told me that he was a neurosurgeon. Seeing as both of us bored out of our minds, we just thought that we'd make things more interesting. It was just a one night stand.'

'And he then turns up here as a nurse, to your displeasure. That explains why you were so Naylorish earlier.' Said Elliott, he seemed to understand quite well.

'We went to talk in the basement but we didn't actually do much talking.' I said, trying to explain.

'Wait, why were you in the basement?' Asked Ollie, why did he have to be so nosey?

'Because we needed to talk in private but one thing lead to another and I ended up asking him to meet me in my office. As you know very Ollie, things just happen.' I said, I made sure that it was clear to the two of them that we were not dating.

'Oh, yes I forgot that the two of you had a fling as you would say.' Said Elliott, the look on Oliver's face was priceless.

'Yeah, but Jac was messing with my head and I was pumped up on adrenaline. What was it you said? Oh yes, your cheesy line was 'other people are easier to fix.' I mean, what else was I supposed to do, walk away?' Said Oliver, I don't think that I'd ever seen Oliver so defensive.

'Number 1 my cheesy line did actually work and number 2 other people are actually easier to fix. You try to fix someone who's been raped, had their mother leave them at the age of twelve, had an abortion and be accused of murder.' I shouted.

I don't know where that sudden rage came from, but as I walked away I felt guilty. Guilt, it's so rare for that to be one of my emotions that when those rare occasions do occur, it throws me completely. What's happening to me?


	3. Breath my darling, just breath

After shouting at the two men, I went back to my office where I found Hanssen and Johnny having a conversation about a procedure that they would be doing later in the week. As I entered, both heads swung around and I was greeted by Hanssen's usual. 'Ms Naylor, could we have a quick word?'

What he means by that is probably, can I talk at you whilst you just sit back and take my crap. I don't think so. 'Well, it depends what this little chat entails. I mean, if it's us discussing when the next people skills course is or when my contract is up, then you can jog on. I'm really not in the mood for the stress which your meetings give me. But if you want to tell me that you've sacked Dr Lo then feel free to carry on with this conversation.'

'Nurse Maconie, would you please leave us.' Said Hanssen pointing to the door. He seemed to have made himself comfortable at my desk. 'Now Ms Naylor, your attitude towards Dr Lo has not changed in the slightest and because of that you may indeed be sent on another course, I think nurse Maconie would also benefit from joining you. But then again, last time the two of you met on a course you found a great way of finishing the evening. Yes, it was the course manager who informed me of your drunken fumble. It appears that she watched you enter a hotel room together. I must say, I'm a little disappointed and surprised at you lack of self-respect, you of all people should know better than to be sleeping around.' Nosey bitch, why the hell does she think that it's her business telling Hanssen?

'What has that got to do with you?' I said rudely.

'It isn't at all professional to be having a relationship with one of your colleagues, especially seeing as the two of you work on the same ward. I think that instead of sleeping with your latest conquest, you should be focussing on your career. I am going to except that you two may be seeing each other as long as it doesn't interfere with your work. If it does, I will be forced to transfer one of you, and seeing as Nurse Maconie is vital to the transplant team, you will be the more likely person to go.'

'It won't and anyway, he's nothing more than a nurse with a little more responsibility, I think that being a consultant trumps being a lowly nurse.' I bit back.

'Miss Naylor, one more comment about my nursing staff and you will be working night shifts for the next five months, do I make myself clear? Anyway, that wasn't actually what I came to discuss with you.' What have I done now?

'Well…' I said, hoping that he'd get on with it.

'I'm not entirely sure that you deserve it, but you remember applying for funding for an overseas research trip.'

'To LMSF.' I said remembering my pointless application.

'Congenital Pectus anomalies.' He said.

'That was more than a year ago.' I said not quite understanding.

'Good things come to she who waits.' What is it with him and these stupid sayings?

'What?' Now I was really confused.

'The trust have agreed to fund a six week placement.' Well, I was not expecting that.

'In San Francisco?' I asked, a smile appearing on my face.

'Unless the collage has relocated to Zimbabwe!' He said, his usual randomness passing over me.

'When?' I asked, eager to go as soon as possible.

'They'd like you to fly out at the weekend.'

'You're joking.' Well, I wasn't expecting it to be that soon.

'The timings a matter of fiscal expediency.' Him and his large, complicated words.

'Ahh, I see, they've got a chunk of budget they need to through at someone.' Well, he could at least make it seem like I wasn't a last resort.

'Is that a no?'

What do you think? 'Ehh, it's just short notice, that's all.'

'For someone with no family, no commitments.' Tell it like is why don't you.

'Well, when you put it like that.'

'You'll be on paid leave as of tomorrow.' Things just get better and better.

'Right.'

'What do you say?'

'Thank you.' I said sarcastically.

'You're welcome.' He said, finally taking his head up from my desk.

I shut the door behind myself, a large smile forming on my face. On my way to find Johnny, Eddi stopped and watched me smile. It's not surprising when people are astonished and stop and stare when I smile but it feels a little odd. I suppose if I was nicer and cheerful more often, then people wouldn't be surprised when those rare occasions that I'm genuinely happy, do actually occur.

I found Johnny sat at the Nurse's station; he was on the phone talking to Nurse Marshall. 'Can I have some more nursing staff up here, we still have two nurses off and have had no cover, this is appalling.'

I just watched him have a go at Simon, he was so much like me, and I like that about him. It means that it's easy for him to understand things from my perspective and it makes it easier for us to work together as our minds are so much alike. Great minds think alike. But it's not always a good thing, we both know how to get into each other's heads and because we're so similar, we often clash. Neither of us is ever going to admit that we have each other, but as long as we both know, everything's good. We know that there aren't any words needed just passion and understanding. A lot of understanding. Understanding of each other's past, know large amounts of knowledge is needed, just the knowing that it was hard and not to go there. I know nothing of his past, but by the way he acts and his issues with being truthful show that there are problems there, he just won't admit them.

My problems in the past are hidden to most apart from Michael and Sacha, but I know that Jos… god Joseph. For the last few weeks, I haven't thought about Joseph once, that must be a god thing right. Johnny is nothing like Joseph, for starters, Johnny's accent is the most amazing thing I've ever heard and he's quite cocky, not in a bad way though. Johnny has the confidence and balls that Joseph never had, he knows how to be a real man, but doesn't shove it in your face. Joseph had a family which he always put first, Johnny has nothing like that. Like me, he has no family, no commitments.

But we both have our close friend who are both surprisingly of the opposite sex, I have Sacha and he has Mo. I guess that without Mo, Johnny wouldn't be here and without Sacha I would completely repel him. Up until now, I never really realised how much everyone needs someone, but we have our friends. I've got Elliott, Sacha and even though I don't like to say it, I guess I've got Michael and Oliver too. As you can tell, I have male friends; I never get on with women as I'm likely to get into a bitch fight with them. Since I've been at Holby, the only women I've actually liked or got on with have been Connie and occasionally Dianne and Sahira. Dianne and Sahira were so similar. They both wanted the same job I wanted and the boss at the time of the consultancy preferred one of them to me. It's a shame that Dianne died; they would have made great friends.

'Enjoy your little meeting with Hanssen?' Asked Johnny, his usual grin on his face.

'Yes actually, I'm going to California!' I stated.

'Finally making that trip to Disney.' He replied sarcastically.

'Yeah, I'm getting the plane with Mickie Mouse. Didn't you get the memo, we're best mates.'

'I'm sure Minnie will be waiting for you to land.'

'Didn't you hear, Mickie and Minnie are having some issues. They're worse than Tara and Oliver, no idea that they having feelings for each other.' I said eying the pair.

'You think it too?' He said seriously.

'God yeah, although I can always tell when Oliver has the hots for someone.' I said watching them as they laughed together.

'I forgot that you could read minds, I mean, you're never wrong are you?'

'Well, I wasn't wrong when he had the hots for me.' I said, walking away.

What, you and Valentine?' He asked, following me.

'Yup, we were going out for years, we were engaged and everything. I got pregnant but then I cheated on him with Mickie Mouse.' I said sarcastically.

'I'm guessing that's why him and Minnie aren't getting on at the moment.' He said laughing.

'No, it was a one of with Oliver.'

'Anyway, what's the real reason for you going to California?' He asked, sitting back down.

'LMSF!' I announced.

'What, the Lakeside Medical College in San Francisco?' He asked, surprised.

'Exactly, I'm going there for six weeks. Sun, see and…'

'No sex!' He interrupted me.

'I was actually going to say studying, and anyway I'm sure there are a lot of other _Neurosurgeons _for me to sleep with.' I said, retaliating.

'Well. I'm sure you'll miss me. I mean, if you hadn't said that you would be happy sleeping with anyone other than me, I would have offered to come with you for a week, but seeing as you'd much rather be on your own, I'll stay put.'

'I need to go, I have packing to do.' I said leaving.

'Wait, when do you leave?' He asked hurriedly.

'This weekend.' I replied.

'I was thinking, if you finish your packing before tonight, I could come over and we could have a bite to eat.' He suggested.

'As you know, I'm very organised so I don't expect that to be a problem.' I replied.

'I'll bring a take away and a couple of bottles of wine.' He said.

'Alright then, bye. Wait you don't know my address.' I said.

'Patient records…' He replied.

'Illegal, no here you go.' I said writing down my address. 'I'll see you later, and no accessing my personal files.'

'Bye then.'

I got home and began to pack quickly. I needed time to clean the house and get ready. I climbed up to the loft and looked around for the suitcases. Most of the things up there were covered in dust and cobwebs. Last time I'd been up there, I had been putting away Joseph's stuff. I couldn't bear to throw it away so I kept it, out of sight out of mind. I found my suitcase almost straight away, it was broken. Perfect.

One more thing for me to do, well at least it meant I could go buy the things I needed. I had no bikinis, shorts, summer clothing, sandals, sunglasses, sun cream and nearly enough nice make up. The first thing would be to go shopping, but where, I don't shop at all. It might be a good idea to find a woman who enjoys shopping. The first name that popped into my head was Connie but he was completely out of the question, then I thought of Chrissie, but she still isn't talking to me since I said that she was close to having a mental breakdown.

The only person who would be suitable to go shopping with was Michael and we weren't exactly 'Best Buds' either. But I'd rather have his help than none at all. I pulled my phone from my pocket and called AAU.

'Hello, AAU.' Said a familiar female voice.

'Hi, Nurse Mckee this is Jac Naylor. Could you possibly put me through to Michael Spence.' I said professionally.

'Yes, I put you through.'

'Hello, Mr Spence.' Came his American accent.

'Hi, it's Jac. Listen, I could really do with a favour and it involves me buying you lunch to say thank you.' I said hoping that lunch would be enough to bribe him.

'Depends.'

'I'm going to the states and I need your help shopping, you know how much I value your opinion on clothing.' I lied.

'Sure, I finish work in about ten minutes so I'll come to yours as soon as I'm done.'

'Thank you, I'm so grateful.' I replied.

'No you're not.' He said hanging up.

We shopped together for over three hours and by the end of it our arms were falling off and my bank account was almost empty. Michael and I walked out of the shopping centre and to his expensive car; we placed the many bags in the boot and climbed in. On our shopping spree we had picked up many items of luxurious clothing; which was far from cheap I can tell you. We had gone into a bag shop which had a large range of suitcases, I picked out a set which was blue and flowery; not my kind of thing but at least it was eye catching.

We arrived at Marzoni's, as Michael knew it was my favourite restaurant. We left the car and headed inside to find the restaurant was almost empty. There were only two tables occupied one was an old couple and the other was a pregnant woman who's back was turned to us. Together we walked over to a waiter who was standing by a large plant, staring into space.

'Um, excuse me.' I said, making myself heard. 'Table for two please.'

'Of course.' He said, he was slightly annoyed at us for disturbing him. He sat us down at my usual table in the corner and handed us two menus although there wasn't any point in him doing so as the two of us been there so often that we knew the menu off by heart.

'I'll have a chicken ceaser salad and a glass off white, how about you Michael?' I asked.

'Same, but a glass off red.' He replied handing back the menu to the waiter. As soon as the waiter left, Michael began to speak again. 'On a diet?'

'What if I am?' I replied defensively.

'Well, if you carry on not eating, you'll waste away and we wouldn't want that would we.' He said sarcastically.

'Are you going to talk crap all night or are we going to have a civilised meal, I know we haven't always been the best of friends but today has been close to bearable.'

'Oh, stop it you're making me blush.' He said in his usual annoying accent. 'Anyway, do you want to know the main reason I agreed to this?' He asked. 'I wanted to know whether you're shagging Maconie or not.'

But before I could put him in his place, a man with his face covered ran in. He was holding a gun. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end as he turned to face me. The man grabbed hold off me by my hair and dragged me from my seat. My heart thumped faster as he put the gun to my throat, I could feel the coldness of the metal as he began pushing it harder into my throat. He pulled me to the counter and shot a forceful look at the waiter.

'Get Vic now.' His emotionless voice spoke. I saw the waiter run off and return with a familiar face. Victoria towards us, fear in her tear filled eyes. 'Now Vic, I want my money and I want it now.' He shouted.

'I haven't got it, you know I haven't.' She said weakly. She realised who it was he was holding and gasped. 'Miss Naylor, is that you?'

'Well, it won't be for much longer unless you get my money. I want my ten thousand pound or she gets it.' His scream piercing threw me.

'Jac!' A woman's voice shouted behind me.

'Mo, run!' Shouted Michael. I heard her clambering from the table, she rushed towards the doors but before she could escape, our capture swung round and pulled the trigger.

'Mo! Mo, are you alright, speak to me Mo!' Shouted Michael, who had rushed to her aid.

'Michel the baby.' Screamed Mo.

'I suggest you start getting me the money or you will be sorry. Why don't you go into the kitchen and locate it before I lose my temper. Remember, no funny business.' He said cruelly.

Vic ran from where she'd come from and was followed by the waiter. Behind us the old couple had rushed out of the door without a sound. Minutes passed by before we heard anything, but it wasn't the sound we were longing for. It was the slamming of a door.

The man who's arm was wrapped across my neck rammed the gun into my stomach and pulled the trigger. The noise of the bang exploded my ear drums as the pain shot threw me. I fell to the ground, I could see the blood seeping through my white shirt. The man ran to where Vic had been and left me lying there.

I could hear Michael talking to me, he said something about Mo's baby but the rest just passed over me. My vision began to blur slightly and I watched as the dark figure rushed towards me. I watched as he ran around me and listened as I heard him look the door.

I pushed myself up and turned to face Michael who was applying pressure to Mo's arm which covered in blood. Mo suddenly grabbed her stomach and screamed. I could hear her waters break.

'Mo, you're going to have to start pushing for me. There's no way we can delay this!' Said Michael who was looking into her frightened eyes.

The man ran from the door and to the till. He threw the till to the ground and began to kick it. I could just make out the smile on his face as he grabbed the small amount of cash. He began rummaging around the bottles, hoping to find more money. The amount he's already found was obviously not enough.

Mo's screaming grew louder and louder as time passed. I heard Michael shout 'One more push!' before the sound of crying filled the room. Then I took one less breath and everything went black.

I opened my eyes to find myself in a strange place. It was Holby General, yet it was different. It was faint and white and empty. There was none of the usual noise and commotion in this strangely deserted place. I could see the rays of sun shining through the windows and onto the mist below. I saw a man in the distance, he looked familiar.

I could see a scar on his left cheek. The scar which I had caused. The scar which I had inflicted on him when I was merely old enough to understand. The scar which had been there since the day he died. The scar which I had traced my finger over as he lay still on the ground. I had done that. I had grabbed the knife. I had attacked him. I had helplessly watched him die at the age of three. Nobody ever understood why I had done it. Nobody could have saved him. Nobody could have saved me. Saved me from the pain. Saved me from a life alone. Saved me from this hell hole which I call my life. Saved me from myself.

'Dad!' I could hear myself screaming. 'Dad, come back.'

Hearing my voice he turned around. 'No Jackie, this isn't right.'

'Dad please, Dad just please. Please forgive me.' I cried out.

'But you can't be here.'

'I can because I'm dying, I know that but I need your help and I can't take that until you give me your forgiveness.'

'Jackie, you need to let go. You know you're not going to get through this, just let go.' He replied as he approached me.

'No!' I couldn't die.

'Just stop fighting it and let it take you away.' He replied as he came closer.

'But I can't, I can't give up.'

'You're nearly there my darling, just let go.' He cried.

'I can't.' I said helplessly.

'Don't you want to be with your family, the people who love you?' He asked.

'But there are people down there who love me.' I told him, trying to convince the both of us that it was true.

'No they don't nobody loves you, nobody cares for you anymore, can't you see, I'm the only one who cares.' He said placing his hand on my cheek and wiping away the tears which tumbled down it.

'Yes, they do!' I screamed angrily. 'I'm not ready to give up, they need me.'

'Fine, but you don't have much time. Just try to breath, it may not make sense now but it will.' He placed a tender kiss on the top of my head and stroked my glossy auburn hair.

'Please forgive me.' I said, the tears falling heavier than ever.

'If you love me enough, then you'll know that my love is returned and will understand that all I need is love to forgive and my darling, the amount I have for you is more than you'll ever know.' He said touchingly.

'I love you.' I whispered.

'I know.' He whispered in return. 'Because I love you twice as much.' He said turning his back on me before fading away.

I took one final look at this beautiful place before closing my eyes and breathing.


	4. Michael Jack Jonathan Effanga

**Sorry it's been so long, I've been on holiday! It's a shorter, rubbisher chapter so sorry, but i promise the next one will be better! Thanks for your reviews! **

**Sophie x**

* * *

**AAU**

Sat at the Nurse's station in AAU, was Eddi Mckee. She sat there reading her Emails as the rest of the ward rushed around, trying their best to clear beds. It had recently been announced by Hanssen that there had been a shooting in the city centre and that they had been made the lead hospital, with all their non-emergencies going to St James' and St Luke's.

Already on AAU, Tara was trying her best to discharge an unhelpful patient. Oliver and Johnny had been sent down to the ED and Darwin had been closed due to short staffing.

'Oy, F1, CT1, come here!' Called Eddi as she scrolled down the page.

'Dear Staff.' Eddi read aloud. 'Due to recent incidents in Neurology, the board and I have put a new rule in place to minimalize the risk of any staff being accused of making personal decisions over a patient's medical diagnosis.'

* * *

**Keller**

'Therefore,' Read Ric to Chantelle, Malick and Serena. 'Not only are staff not allowed to treat family members, they're not allowed to treat anybody they have ever had a relationship with, however long or short, or anybody who they are friends with and that does include your close colleagues.'

* * *

**ED **

'Staff will be suspended if they do break these new rules unless there are desperate circumstances.' Read Zoe. 'Best regards, Henrick Hanssen.'

'So that means that if I fell off a cliff, none of you would be allowed to treat me.' Said Dylan.

'That's what it says.' Replied Zoe. 'Anyway, enough about that. Nurse Maconie, Dr Valentine, we have 3 casualties coming in from the shooting. A 36 year old female, gunshot wounds to the abdomen and chest, me, Johnny, Nick and Oliver can take her. A 38 year old female with gunshot wounds to the arm. She gave birth at the scene and the baby is alright but premature. So Tom, can you Linda and Charlie take the kid as there are no beds on SCUBO and Dylan, Sam and Tess can take the mum. And there is also a 43 year old male who has internal bleeding as he was kicked numerous times in the stomach by the gunman.'

'How far away?' Asked Tess, but before anyone could answer, the doors were flung open and in rushed Jeff and Dixie.

Laid sprawled on a bed was a young woman, her hair was scattered round her pale face. Her eyes were lightly closed and she had a streak of crimson blood across her right cheek. Her body was still and lifeless, her arms and legs were laid limply beside her body. Her white shirt had been cut away and in its place were blood stained packs.

'This is Jacqueline Naylor, 36, multiple gunshot wounds to the abdomen. She's lost a lot of blood. We had to sedate her in the ambulance as she completely lost it and kicked Jeff in the balls.' Said Dixie, laughing at the last bit.

Johnny rushed over to find Jac laid there unconscious. His heart dropped. He could here Oliver stood behind him, trying to tell him to move. The trolley passed him and he carried on standing there, staring into space.

'Fletch, could you take Johnny of the ward please, he's not fit to be working here.' Said Zoe calmly. Fletch walked Johnny off the ward and they disappeared.

'Dr Hanna, I'm sorry, but I can't treat her either.' Said Oliver stepping back from Jac.

'Yes you can, stop being so unprofessional.' Shouted Zoe.

'No, he's right, neither can I, you read the Email. It's not ethical.' Said Nick. 'That's CT consultant, Jac Naylor. All three of us know her personally and believe it's in everyone's best interests if you and Sam treat her.'

'Fine, but you two can take the other woman, okay.' Said Zoe as the doors flew open again.

'This is Morean Effanga, 38, shot in the arm. She's stable but she needs to get to theatre ASAP!'

'Mo, you've got to be kidding me, who's the other casualty?' Asked Oliver who was obviously finding it tough.

'Michael Spence, he's on his way in now.' Said Linda.

'No, I'm not allowed to treat any of them, this isn't right.' Said Oliver. 'Send Mo and Jac to Keller and let me take Michael to AAU.'

* * *

**Keller 8 minutes later**

'Get Jac into theatre now, Malick you're assisting. Serena Mo is your call, I'd suggest that you clamp the Artery for now and wait for back up.' Said Ric. 'And can you get me the next of kin for both of them.'

'Mo's sister is on the way in and I'm about to phone Elliott Hope.' Said Chantelle who was searching for his number on the computer.

'Why?' Asked Ric.

'He's Miss Naylor's next of kin; she doesn't seem to have any family. Although in her notes, her next of kin has been changed loads of times. When she was brought into hospital as a child, her next of kin was her mother Paula Burrows. Then when she had a bike crash, wow I never knew she had a bike crash, it was someone called Joseph Byrne, his number's on here somewhere. Then when she donated a kidney to her mother, it was Sacha Levy and now it's Elliott Hope and Connie Beauchamp.' Said Chantelle as you read through Jac's notes.

'Really, it says Connie Beauchamp.' Said Ric who was evidently surprised.

'Yup, wow I never knew that she was so close with Sacha. It says here that she had an abortion in 2009!' Said Chantelle.

'Let me guess, was it in February 2009?'

'Yeah, why?'

'I think that I and about 10 others owe Ms Naylor a sincere apology. Anyway I need to get to theatre so try and get hold of both of them ok.' Said Ric as he rushed off. Chantelle tried to phone Elliott, but there was no answer. So she tried Connie.

'Hello, Connie Beauchamp speaking.' Said Connie with her upmost professionalism.

'Hi, Mrs Beauchamp, I'm Chantelle Lane, I'm a nurse at Holby city Hospital.' She said, but before she could continue Connie spoke.

'Holby, what's happened?' Said Connie worriedly.

'Well, you and Mr Elliott Hope are listed as Ms Jacqueline Naylor's next of kin. I have tried calling Mr Hope but he isn't answering so Jac's doctor, Mr Griffin told me to phone you.'

'What's happened?'

'Ms Naylor was shot in the early hours of this evening. She's gone into septic shock; that means that she has a serious infe-' But before she could go any further, Connie cut her off.

'Look Nurse whatever your name is, I'm a CT consultant. I was the director of surgery at Holby two years ago and I'm a better surgeon than Henrick Hanssen. So if you wouldn't mind handing me over to someone else, I would be ever so grateful.' Said Connie.

'Well, I haven't got anybody else you can talk to right now.' Said Chantelle who was beginning to get very scared of Connie.

'Her surgeons Ric, so put me on to Ric.'

'Sorry but he's in theatre.' Replied Chantelle.

'Listen here princess, get me on the phone to Ric Griffin right now, or I swear to god, when I get there you will be sorry.' Said Connie nastily. Chantelle ran as fast as she could to the theatre and got Ric for her.

* * *

**In theatre 10 minutes later…**

After 10 minutes of trying to calm Connie down, Ric was able to get back to saving Jac. He had just removed the second bullet from Jac's abdomen when there was a bleed.

'BPs dropping!' Said Malick as he grabbed the suction. Johnny and Fletch rushed into theatre to find every machine in the room beeping like mad.

'Okay, we're going to have to remove her ovaries.' Said Ric sadly.

'There must be another way.' Said Johnny from behind the glass. 'Factor 7, use factor 7.'

'There's not enough time, she's bleeding out.' Said Malick. 'BP's dropping. We need to act fast.'

'Wouldn't you rather she loses her ovaries than her life?' Johnny fell silent. 'Right, clamps.'

* * *

**On Keller, an hour later…**

Johnny sat beside Jac, waiting for her to awaken. After waiting another 10 minutes, he opened the curtains to the next bed and sat beside Mo who was cradling her tiny baby in her arms.

'How are you feeling?' Asked Johnny sympathetically.

'Like I've just been shot.' Said Mo sarcastically.

'What happened, Mo?' Asked Johnny seriously.

'I was eating at the restaurant when some guy came in. He had a gun and went mad, he grabbed Jac and began to argue with the cook, saying that she owed him money or something. Michael saw me and told me to run, but when I did he shot me in the arm. My waters broke, but before anything happened a door slammed and the gunman shot Jac in the stomach. She just lay there so still, I thought she was dead. Michael made me start pushing and I gave birth to him. It was horrible but after that, things got worse. After shooting Jac, the man ran through into the kitchens, but he returned. Michael tried to grab him in the struggle he tried to shoot Michael, but Jac got shot again. He threw Michael to the floor and just started kicking him and punching him. He went mad. I was sat on the floor of the restaurant, applying pressure to my arm, my baby was laid next to me and I couldn't even hold him. Then everything went black. The next thing I knew, I was in an ambulance and everyone just kept telling me I was safe. Johnny I was so scared.' Cried Mo.

'Hey, but you are safe now. You have a little boy to take care of and that's all that matters. Anyway, what are you going to call him?' Asked Johnny.

'Well, I was thinking Michael as he delivered him. Michael Jack Jonathan Effanga.' Said Mo who had begun to calm down.

'Hello, Michael Jack Jonathan Effanga, I'm your uncle Johnny.' Said Johnny proudly…

* * *

**_I promise that the next chapter will have more 'Janny' action! Please review :)_**


	5. You're safe now

**Hiya, sorry it's been so long again! Hope to update soon! Please review... Enjoy :)**

**Sophie x**

* * *

'_Hey, but you are safe now. You have a little boy to take care of and that's all that matters. Anyway, what are you going to call him?' Asked Johnny._

'_Well, I was thinking Michael as he delivered him. Michael Jack Jonathan Effanga.' Said Mo who had begun to calm down._

'_Hello, Michael Jack Jonathan Effanga, I'm your uncle Johnny.' Said Johnny proudly._

* * *

Jonny suddenly heard a loud choking noise from behind him. He swung around to find Jac, choking on something, she had obviously only just woken up. Johnny rushed over to her, grabbed her, sat her on his lap and squeezed her stomach, making her cough violently. He stroked her hair as he laid her back down in bed.

'Go.' Said Jac blankly.

'What?' Said Jonny, surprised at what she's said.

'Go?' She repeated before rolling over in the bed.

'Jac, look at me.' He said rushing round to the other side of the bed. 'I'm not going anywhere. I want to be here for you, you've got to believe me when I say that I care.'

'You've known me for a week, you don't even know me.' Said Jac, refusing to listen to his kindness.

'I do know you.' He said.

'How, you've slept with me twice and now you think that you know everything about me. you don't care about me, nobody does.' She croaked.

'No, but I've been talking to people, Michael told me a lot. I spoke to Elliott, Michael, Sacha, Oliver, Ric and Chrissie. Each of them told me a little bit about you and now I'm starting to understand why you're so broken. I know all about Joseph, about your mum, about Alan Clooney, what happened with baby Freya and how you had an abortion three years ago and how you grew up in care, I know that it's tough in there, I've been through it myself. I want to know you, so don't say that I don't care, cause I do.' Said Jonny stroking Jac's face gently.

'You were in care?' She asked.

'Since I was seven; my mum killed herself after my dad died from cancer. Obviously I wasn't enough for her to live for.' He said emotionally. 'I got bullied in care because I was an orphan, they said that I was the reason that my mum had topped herself and that nobody wanted me. When I was fourteen, I was attacked by my social worker. He pushed me down the stairs and kicked me in the ribs and broke four of them. I was so scared of social workers so I ran away shortly after I got out of hospital and I lived on the streets for a month before I was caught. But after that, I got on with my work and passed my GCSEs and A levels with flying colours and got into med school. I'm trained as I doctor, but I realised that I wanted to be with people so I retrained as a nurse.'

'When I was three, I umm, I err, I… I… I…' Stuttered Jac.

'You can tell me.' Said Jonny reassuringly.

'When I was three, I… I murdered my dad.' Said Jac looking away.

'What?' Blurted out Jonny, his eyes filled with fear and shock.

'I was playing with my doctors kit, in the living room, my Mum was at work as usual and Dad had gone out to 'Sort out some business' so I was all on my own. At the age of three. He had left his bag, and whilst he was out, I opened it. Inside there was this knife, wrapped up in a cloth. I just sat on the floor staring at it laid in my hands. I don't remember much after that but, my dad came home ten minutes later and went mad. I was so scared, he grabbed hold of me and tried to grab it off me but I slashed his face with the knife. He tried again but I ended up stabbing him in the chest. He fell, on the floor. I put a bandage on the wound on his chest, expecting it to make him all better. But it didn't. He just lay there. Dead. I sat there afterwards, stroking the bleeding cut on his face. That's how my mum found me.' Said Jac in floods of tears.

'Oh Jac, I'm so sorry.' Said Jonny. 'Look, I'm going to have you put into a side room, okay.' He said, before rushing off to find Ric.

Jonny returned, Ric following behind.

'Is it alright if we go through things now?' Asked Ric as he read through Jac's notes.

'Yeah, I suppose.' Said Jac absently.

'Ok then, we were able to remove both bullets from your abdomen. I'm afraid that when we removed the second bullet, there was a massive bleed. There was a risk that with all the blood loss you might not have made it. We had no choice…'

'Go on.' Said Jac who was dreading the next part of the sentence.

'We had to remove both your ovaries. I'm really very sorry.' Said Ric sympathetically.

Jac flung her head back and began to cry.

'You should have just let me die.' Said Jac helplessly.

'Jac, look at me. You have so much more to live for.' Said Jonny. 'Mr Griffin, is it alright if Jac's moved into the side room.'

'I don't see why not.' Said Ric. Ric and Jonny wheeled Jac into the side room and Ric left them to it.

'Jac, I'm so sorry.' Said Jonny.

'Don't be, I'm just not meant to be a mother. I can cope with that.' Said Jac as Jonny sat down on the chair beside her. 'Thank you.'

* * *

Jonny was awoken hours later, by Jac screaming. 'Help, help, run, Mo run. Michael, help.'

'Shhh, Jac, you're safe now. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere.' Said Jonny soothingly, stroking Jac's hair.

Jac looked up into his eyes and sobbed. Jonny climbed into her bed and cradled her in his arms. He desperately wanted to protect her. Jac rested her head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. She cuddled up to him and smiled.

'Jac, once you're discharged. Come stay with me, I can take care of you.' Said Jonny.

'I don't need you to take care of me.' Said Jac independently.

'Yes you do. You can't be at home, on your own. You know that I can't just leave you on your own.'

'Okay.' Said Jac simply before she fell asleep.

* * *

Later on that evening, Connie entered the ward in search of Ric. She soon found him, hiding behind his desk.

'Connie, it's great to see you.' Said Ric.

'Likewise.' Said Connie.

'You look lovely, been somewhere special.' Asked Ric, attempting to start a conversation.

'I was in the middle of having dinner with the Prime minister when I got a call from a nurse who I would like to catch up with.' Said Connie grandly.

'The Prime Minister, as in David Cameron.' Said Ric.

'Yes, Mr Cameron and I were at a dinner party. As you probably know, not only am I the best heart surgeon in the country, but I am also the medical manager of the National Health Service. Meaning that all changes in the National Health Service are down to me, that and I'm the third richest women in Britain. As you can probably imagine, having connections with someone as important as the Prime Minister carries wait in many different places.' Explained Connie proudly.

'I always knew that you'd be a bloody politician.' Mumbled Ric.

'Anyway, where's Jac.' Said Connie ignoring Ric.

'Side room.' Said Ric looking back down at his paperwork.

Connie walked away towards the side room and opened the door carefully. She found a sight in which she was not expecting. Jac was cuddled up in Jonny's arms. Connie was clueless to who this new man was, but never the less, she was grateful that Jac was finally happy.

Connie looked up towards the sky and smiled before mouthing the words 'Thank you.'

* * *

After an hour of waiting, Connie was grateful to see that the couple were beginning to awaken. Jonny woke first, carefully climbing out of the bed and was surprised to find a tall women, due to the heels she was wearing, with long, curly brown hair and big brown eyes. Her hair hand been pinned into a neat bun, a strand of hair was lying across her face and she brushed it away carelessly. She was wearing a purple floor length dress, it had detailed beading on its single shoulder and showed of her wonderful figure. Connie's lips were bright red and her long, black eye lashed fluttered as she grinned at the man who had recently awoken. In her right hand was a black beaded clutch bag which matched her stilettos.

Before Connie was able to say anything, Jac start screaming again. She tossed and turned in her bed, then opened her eyes. Jonny was back by her side in a flash and grabbed her hand and stroked her hair.

But this time she took longer to awaken and began to scream 'Jonny, Jonny I'm dying. I'm dying.'

'Shh, Jac you're not dying. See I'm here. I'm here.' Said Jonny calmly.

'Jac?' Said Connie as she stepped into view. 'Jac what have you done to yourself.'

'Why are you here, who called you?' Jac asked trying not to sound rude.

'Jac, I'm your next of kin. Why have you been avoiding my calls? A year and a half I've been trying to contact you and nothing. I haven't spoken to you since the 2nd of January 2012, what's happened and where's Joseph.' Said Connie who obviously had no clue about what had gone.

Jonny who had no clue who this woman was, or who this mysterious Joseph was either so he hurriedly said 'Do you to want a coffee? I'm going to pulses.'

'Skinny latte, extra shot. No sugar.' Said Jac and Connie together.

'Right, I'll just go get those then.' Said Jonny laughing. He left the room quickly, avoiding the eyes of the women glaring at him.

'So, what happened and why did you shut me out?' Asked Connie.

'Joseph left, two weeks after you.' Said Jac remembering everything that happened…

* * *

'_Come away with me.' Said Joseph out of the blue. 'There's a GP practise in Penrith, looking for someone to take over. We could run it, live in the hills, go for walks, take high tea, have log fires.'_

'_You know I don't do country.' Said Jac calmly, although she was screaming inside. _

'_I sense a softening in you.' Said Joseph grinning. _

'_Where on earth did this spring from?' Asked Jac, despite the fact that she knew the answer._

'_It's the perfect solution. Wife, son, dog, what's not to like?' Said Joseph persuasively._

'_Is that his way of proposing?' She thought to herself. 'The wife son and dog bit.' She replied, not making it easy for him._

'_Be serious.' He said._

'_You be serious.' She retaliated._

'_I am, come away with me.'_

'_No.' She said loudly, not even thinking about what she was saying._

'_Don't make this hard.' He said, disguising his hurt._

'_I'm not; I just can't, for so many reasons. You stay here, we'll rule the empire as husband and wife. I'll wear nice shoes and afford to be you descent clothes.' She suggested hopefully._

'_I can't stay here.' His grin still plastered to his face._

'_Give me one good reason.' She said, but she could think of many._

'_A job, it's too much with a child. This gives us the best of both worlds.' He said walking round to her side of the table._

'_This gives us the worst of either.' She said sadly._

'_Please.' He rested his hand one hers. 'I have to do this, for Harry.'_

'_I understand that.' Her eyes began to glisten with tears. 'I have even admire it; prioritising.'_

'_But you won't give up everything.' He said as he felt the tears coming too._

'_I give up my life, my career, my whole identity. For a man who will always put me second. You said it, Harry comes first.' She said, now crying. 'I love you.'_

'_I love you too.' He said, knowing that this would be the last time he'd ever say it. _

_They lent in a kissed each other for one final time. It was tender and soft, and full of love. They put everything into that kiss and didn't want to pull away. But they had to. They always have to. They can't ever be happy. Not together at least. No matter how hard they try, something will tear them from one another. Destroying them both in the process._

'_I don't want to lose you.' She said, struggling to get her words out. 'Stay, please.'_

'_I can't, I've told Hanssen to stick his job.' He told her, making her laugh, in spite of her tears._

_She rose from where she was sitting and wrapped her arms around him tightly. She sobbed into his shoulder and he held her tightly, burying his head in her hair. When they parted, their lips locked again. This time it was more passionate. He pulled her stomach towards him and lifted her off the ground. He placed her onto the work top, but didn't let go. _

_She ran her fingers through his soft hair, her thoughts only of him. She knew he was about to leave her, but she wasn't quite ready to let go. Last time, she was still able to see him. But now he was gone, forever. _

_When they finally drew apart, he stared into her eyes and smiled. She just cried more. He gave her one last hug before saying 'I'm so sorry. Please don't ever forget how much I love you.' Then, with a tender kiss planted on her head, he turned on his heal and left. Leaving her in tears. 'Please don't go.' She sobbed… but he was gone…_

* * *

'Oh Jac, I'm so sorry. You should have told me, do you not trust me anymore?' Connie asked, slightly hurt.

'I do, it's just… I tried my best to cut myself off from the past. You, Joseph, even my friendship with Sacha is fading away. He's currently in Holby Care by the way, so if you want to see him he's there.' Seeing the confused look on Connie's face she added. 'He was stabbed, Michael is… Michael, where's Michael and Mo… what happened?' Said Jac as she begun to panic.

'Jac, breath with me, okay.' Said Connie pressing the panic button.

Despite Connie's best efforts, Jac continued to panic and became unable to breathe. She began to choke and vomiting blood. Falling back unconscious.

* * *

Walking across the ward was Jonny, he had to cups of coffee in his hands, and was whistling to himself. But he soon stopped when Ric and Serena came rushing past him in the direction of the side room. He dropped the coffees on the floor and followed them to find Connie trying her best to awaken Jac. He ran to her side and grabbed her hand and kissed her head.

'Come on Jac; wake up for me, please.' He begged.

'Jonny come out of the way.' Said Serena who was watching as her BP was dropping, lower and lower. Then all the machines in the room began to scream. 'She in VF. Get me a crash team.' Shouted Serena as she climbed onto the bed doing compressions.

'What's happening?' Screamed Jonny.

Ric and a nurse began wheeling Jac out of the room. 'Theatre 2, now, someone page Elliott, I don't care whether he can or can't operate on her. if he doesn't get here soon she's going to die.' Shouted Ric. 'Get Hanssen as well, he's going to have to see what his new rules are doing.'

'Forget Elliott, he won't be here in time. I'll do it.' Said Connie. Serena looked at her oddly. 'Connie Beauchamp, CT Consultant, I'm sure you know who I am.'

'Connie Beauchamp, you're Connie Beauchamp. It's a pleasure.' Said Serena.

'She's not that amazing, I mean she's a good surgeon and all that but she's no better than Jac or Elliott.' Said Ric, denting Connie's giant ego.

'Get out of the way.' Shouted Serena as a nurse jumped away, narrowly escaping being run over. Her pager suddenly began to go. 'Jonny get my pager.'

He grabbed it and read out. 'AAU, Michael deteriorating, come quick!'

'Ric, can you go please.' Said Serena. Ric rushed off, leaving Connie to push the trolley.

They got to theatre and left Jonny to wait outside. He began pacing the corridor, fearing the worst. Oliver came rushing down the corridor, he hand gone in search of Jac, but was told that she'd been rushed to theatre.

'Jonny?' Said Oliver as he saw the tears running down Jonny's face. 'What's happening, is she alright?'

'I don't know, Serena and Connie Beauchamp are operating on her now.' Said Jonny.

'Connie's here?' Said Oliver.

'She's Jac's next of kin.'

'I can believe that. Anyway, I have some terrible news. I've just been sent up from AAU. Michael died on the table. He had a Sirius bleed and Luc and Ric were unable to save him.'

'Oh my god, how am I going to tell Jac? It would break her.' Cried Jonny. 'Right, we can't tell Jac, she wouldn't cope, she'd be heart broken.'

* * *

Thanks for reading, please review :)


End file.
